New Disciplinary Move

The other Sunday after worship, a young mother told how she got her fidgety child to sit still and be quiet. She said that halfway through the sermon, she leaned over and whispered, "If you don't be quiet, Brother Wayne is going to lose his place and will have to start his sermon all over again!" And she added as she went out the door, "It worked!"

And then there was the time I preached on how Jesus fed 5000 men and their families with two loaves and fishes. After the service, three guys wanted to know if the fish were bass or catfish, and what bait Jesus used to catch them

Does that mean they were rednecks? Well, you might  be a redneck:

• If you think fast food is hitting a opossum at 75 mph.
• Fifth grade was the best four years of your life.
• You own a homemade fur coat.
• You think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture.
• You think Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company.
• Your goal in life is to own a fireworks stand (a new option here in Kentucky), or if
• You think the stock market has a fence around it.